Monday, July 21, 2014

Co-Sleeping Decoded [a step-by-step guide]

I told you last week C stopped sleeping.  Just completely.  Sleep strike.  It’s been going on for about a month and it’s getting better, but it’s still a little rough [note to self: blog relaunch + sleep strike = bad idea!]

The only way he’ll sleep is with either Adam or I.  While C’s dealing with this separation anxiety, the pediatrician suggested extra snuggles and then slowly putting more distance between us and C.  This way C is reassured that we’re near by, and eventually we’ll be able to tuck him in and call it a day.

We originally thought we were really smart.  We have a trundle bed that goes with the daybed set I used as a child.  We put the trundle in C’s room for us and set up C’s toddler bed.  He was not feeling it.  He wanted to be right beside us.  C wanted to co-sleep.

Over the last month we’ve co-slept and we’ve discovered there’s a plethora of phases and maneuvers to survive co-sleeping with a toddler.

Phase 1:  Get Back In This Bed NOW
Seriously kid, it’s time to nap.  If you want to help with laundry I’ll gladly let you later.  Also, I don’t need wipes in bed, but thanks.

Phase 2:  The Wiggle Worm
I know you’re tired.  I’ve seen you rub your eyes a dozen times.  Can’t get comfortable?  Sure just lay on top of me.

Phase 3:  Stop Putting Stuff In My Face
I really don’t need a binky and when you put the pillow on my face I can’t breathe.  Great job sharing, though!

Phase 4:  Seriously, I’m Not A Jungle Gym
Come on buddy, that hurts!  How is that even comfortable?  I know you’re tired.  Just give in.  It’s okay.

Phase 5:  The Sweet Snuggle
If you’re lucky enough to get to this step, congrats!  You might actually survive the night with some sanity left!

Phase 6:  The Lung Crush
I appreciate the snuggles, but you’re 35 pounds kiddo!  Mommy.  Can’t.  Breathe!

Phase 7:  My Kid Is Finally Asleep And Now I’m Stuck 
This usually occurs just as your bladder is completely full.  You might even take a few selfies just to make sure he’s asleep. 

Phase 8:  How Much Longer Until I Can Get Out Of Here
You’re in the home stretch!  Your kid is asleep and you’ve managed to scoot out from underneath.  Now, if you could just not think about running water long enough to make sure he’s completely out.

Phase 9:  The Sneak Away
The last and final test!  All you have to do is army crawl across the floor, avoiding creaks, without running into furniture, and turn the toddler-proof door knob without disturbing the dogs.  It’s best to hold your breath for this part as it takes SERIOUS concentration.

Phew!  I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted just reliving the pictures!

Do/Did you co-sleep?
Can you relate to any of these phases?  What’s your fave/least fave?

Did I leave out any phases/steps?

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